ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
735: An Epic Defense Force!	741: Eiga Taiketsu! Shutsugeki Isshu Boeitai!	When The Zorua Squeaks			The twerps help Luke win a big-time studio contract	Blink and you'd miss them	Children are an untapped source of studio income!

Today finds the twerps in... Virbank City! They're there, they made it, there is mountain or forest or little town or cave... they're in the city! Of course, there MUST be a distraction to get in the way of Ash having his eighth Gym Battle, and it comes in the form of callbacks!

Cilan is freaking out over being in Virbank City, waxing lyrical (to Iris' dismay) about the film industry and its rich history in Virbank. But as he gushes, Pikachu is weirded out by something just out of sight, so Ash turns to see.... Ash!?! No it's not Richie back to ruin the series, but Zorua! Taking on the form of Ash for a laugh, she snickers and changes back, as the twerps realise she is the Zorua that belongs to Luke... and there he is, filming as usual. Realising the twerps are there, he says a happy hello and reveals he has been invited to Virbank for a preview event before THE opening. What opening is that? Cilan suspects he knows, and he gets even MORE excited at the prospect.



Apparently the opening is for PokeStar Studios, a theme park located right on the studio lot itself. It's a place where the public can see film props and movie sets, AND you can even make your own movie - which sounds like a cheap way for the studio to get their hands on some z-grade film assets! So why did Luke get an invite to a preview? It seems the non-union film he made with the twerps took top honours at a recent film festival and caught the studio's attention. The twerps are delighted, this means they took top honours too (just no money or royalties!), with Ash proudly declaring that HE was the star. Sensing a change to exploit the twerps once more for his own commercial gain, Luke asks if they want to help him out, telling them he'll explain what he means later and distracting them with an invite into the theme park with him. Cilan twitches with near orgasmic delight, while Luke is already playing the big shot by explaining that of course they can come in, they're with HIM!

Ash makes a hesitant point that they're kinda here for a Gym Battle, but Cilan is having none of this. He launches himself forward and grabs Ash by the shoulder, crying into his face that the Gym isn't going anywhere (well, the Gym Leader might!), and does he REALLY want to have to wait in line for hours to get into the park like normal people do? Ash points out that he really doesn't care one way or the other, but Cilan does! He grabs Ash by the wrist and hauls him away in his excitement, with Luke and Iris having to follow on in his wake.

Arriving at the studio/theme park, Cilan is beyond excited, especially when he realises they've reaching the Pokémon Walk of Fame, featuring the paw prints of various Pokémon from the movies. There are classic film posters on the billboards, props behind glass and... that's it? So far the amazing theme park appears to just be a rather small museum of film memorabilia. Cilan is exhausted by the excitement though, and they settle on a little park bench to catch their breath, where Luke lets the other shoe drop. He was invited along with other aspiring directors to make a film using the studio/park's assets as part of a competition, with the winner to be named best picture and presumably get some kind of contract with the studio. Cilan and Iris are both excited to be part of some more non-union, unpaid work to benefit somebody else, but Ash is less excited, wanting to get to his goddamn Gym Battle. The excitement of the others convinces him to be less selfish though and he agrees, and his tepid, late acknowledgement is apparently JUST the kind of spirit the Studio Head - Mr Gold - likes to see! A portly, moustachioed man - Mr. Gold appears on the scene of the seemingly deserted park (we've only see Luke and the twerps in there so far) to greet Luke, telling him he has seen his work (all one film of it) and that it is his duty to exploi... to nurture young talent!

Luke and the twerps are shown by an assistant the wardrobe that will be used by all the directors. She gives Luke a book of the props and sets that are available to use, and Luke explains that by making all the directors use the same assets, it will be their skills as directors that makes them stand out.

In the commissary, Ash and Iris are enjoying a burger and talking about a movie called "Dirty Herdier" in which the main star ate a meal while fighting bank robbers. Cilan and Luke, however, are DEVOURING the script which they have just written. Ash and Iris ask what it is about and Luke shows them his storyboards (though we don't get to see them) and they gush over how good it all looks. Somebody doesn't agree though, as a voice speaks up to declare that Luke's story is "lukewarm". Who is responsible for this terrible pun? Why it's Jules!



Who the fuck is Jules?

Apparently he is a rival director of Luke's, though Ash is more interested in his Krookodile, which is the evolved form of Krokorok. They've been competing against each other for the top prize at various festivals, with Jules insisting that his hardboiled action flicks make anything that Luke produces lukewarm (there's that pun again) by comparison. They glare at each other, declaring that the audience will decide with their votes when their films have been made.

they head into wardrobe, where Ash, Pikachu and Pignite put on uniforms and become members of The Unova Defense Force. Cilan is the alien villain who controls the Mecha Tyranitar, and Iris, Axew and Zorua are Island Princesses.... which must be a hell of a thing for the boy Axew to be playing. Cilan will also be playing Mecha Tyranitar, which involves him wearing a full body-suit and presumably will feature city models to make him appear to be a giant. Cilan explains what a Tyranitar is to Iris, since it comes from the Johto region.

Luke is also using his Pokémon Golett and Leavanny as crew since that means he doesn't have to pay them any money either. They head off to film their first scene on a green screen background, with the Unova Defense Force flying in a spaceship to fight the Mecha Tyranitar. Using the green screen, a fan and some smoke they're able to create the impression of flight and great speed, and Luke is so delighted with the first take that he decides that is all they need and there is no need for a second take, even for protection!

I'm starting to suspect this small boy doesn't actually know all that much about film-making at all!

Next is a scene of various Pokémon panicking (and Stunfisk happily flopping about on the ground), and Ash and Iris compliment them on their acting, which especially pleases Oshawott. Following this, Iris has to summon tears for a scene where she is despairing over a fallen Golett. But Iris can't make herself cry on cue, and asks for eyedrops. Luke insists he wants the scene all in one take though, and Cilan decides to offer some encouragement by telling Iris to imagine being separated from Axew forever! This cruel and unnecessary baiting does the trick as she imagines this very thing and bursts into tears. Next is a UFO scene with Cilan showing off his fishing connoisseur skills as he dangles a UFO model amidst smoke. Luke isn't pleased with it though, and shows Ash a picture of another model and asks him to go and fetch it from the props department.

As Ash heads off though, outside the studio a distressed, transparent Pokémon flits through the sky. Hiding by trees, it is being pursued by... Team Rocket! They're back, dressed in trenchcoats, hats and sunglasses and trying to find their target once more. As they look about, the near invisible Pokémon heads into the studio to hide from them.

In the props department, Ash and Pikachu are looking about and find the model... but then sense the Pokémon nearby. It tries to hide and knocks over some wooden panels, becoming visible in the panic. Ash sees the wood falling towards it and leaps to the rescue, getting it clear... but when he looks at what he caught... there's nothing there?

Back on set, they film the two models swinging about in the smoke before Luke calls it a wrap, saying they have it all in the can. It seems a film is easy and quick to make when there are no unions involved and you film everything in one take! They head into a little theatre to watch what they've produced, then Luke begins the editing process before they head into the sound studio to do dubbing, before finally holding their wrap party with bread and orange juice.

It seems everybody else was just as fast, as before you know everybody is settled into a movie theatre to watch each of the movies in competition (presumably they're short films and not 90 minute+ affairs). Jules' film receives a lot of applause, telling the story of an attack by Mecha Tyranitar that is ended when Jules and his Krookodile use "The Final Blaster" despite what will happen to "the kidnapped Pokémon". They blast the Mecha Tyranitar and the film ends with a rather disturbing image of the severed head of the Mecha Tyranitar in the background as Jules and his Krookodile celebrate in the foreground.



And what DID happen to kidnapped Pokémon?

Next up is Luke's film, opening with a cute parody of the MGM Lion roar using Zorua. The film tells the story of the Unova Defense Force protecting Pokémon Island from a giant Tyranitar that was approaching through the sea. Their attack reveals it to be a Mecha-Tyranitar, and it blasts their ship out of the sky. As Ash, Pignite and Pikachu parachute to safety, a UFO sweeps in out of the sky, piloted by the evil alien played by Cilan, who declares he will take every Pokémon on the island for the planet Cilanilon! Landing, Ash meets the twin Princesses Iris, Princess Axew and Golett. They explain to Ash that they can't abandon the island as it is the resting place of Golurk the Titan, whom they must restore to fight Mecha Tyranitar!

Cilan captures Island Pokémon with his UFO's tractor beam, while the twin princesses make a plea to the statue of Golurk only for it to be shattered by the Mecha Tyranitar. It then blasts at the Princesses, who are saved by Golett leaping into the path of the blast. They rush to its side as it dies, and the two Princesses (with a split screen going on since Zorua-Iris wouldn't be able to cry on cue) cry over its dead body. In a call-back to the first Pokémon movie, their tears restore it to life, as it evolves into Golurk and grows to a massive size. The Titan Golurk clashes with the Mecha Tyranitar, overpowering it, knocking it onto its back and uses Mega Punch to smash it in the belly and destroy it for good.

The alien Cilan is horrified that his "delicious" plot was foiled, and blasts at Golurk only for his attack to be easily blocked by one massive paw. It uses Psychic to rescue the kidnapped Pokémon (take that, Jules!) and then spins up directly into the UFO, sending it spinning out of control with Cilan vowing revenge. Golurk returns to the ground and shines a green light on the shattered remains of the statue, restoring it in place. Golurk then disappears, and the twin Princesses are delighted to see Golett is back. They rush to its side to thank it, while Ash talks happily about the bond between human and Pokémon while a bunch of the island Pokémon dance happily on a rock in the background (and Stunfisk happily flops about).

The film ends and the lights come up to.... silence. Luke's initial happiness fades as he realised that nobody liked his one-take per scene, non-union film. Jules grins back over his shoulder at him, declaring that he won... and then the crowd bursts into applause and rises to their feet, they loved the film!

The four directors (only four, all children) step up onto stage for the results of the voting, and of course it is Luke who is declared the winner for his sappy, crowd pleasing affair. Jules is horrified, but Luke pays no attention to him as he is handed the trophy and Mr. Gold says he looks forward to seeing his next film, and then the GRAND PRIZE is announced - Luke will get to make a film for the studio (and make them a ton of money!) with their full backing.

They might have mentioned this earlier, you know! Maybe the other directors would have tried harder!?!

Outside the studio, the twerps say their goodbyes to Luke who doesn't need them anymore now that their unpaid work has set him up for life. They talk about their own dreams (well, Iris doesn't) and Ash's determination to win his 8th Gym Badge - and hopefully there will be no more distractions along the way! But as they head off into the sunset, there is of course ALWAYS another distraction just waiting to come along - it's just that this one is a little harder to see than most.

BEST QUOTES

"Uhhh.... but what about my gym battle?" "ASH! The gym isn't going anywhere, you know!"

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