ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
004: Challenge of the Samurai	004: Samurai Shounen no Chousen	Challenge of the Fatty			Ash gets into a mini-rivalry with a fat wannabe samurai!	Tanked	Mistreat your Pokémon and they'll turn into Butterfrees

A loud squeal echoes through the forest and birds take flight in fright. Peering closer, we discover a grumpy Ash and bemused Pikachu staring at Misty, who currently has her legs wrapped around the branch of a tree and is making a high pitched moaning noise (GETCHA MINDS OUTTA DA GUTTA!).

"What's wrong now?" complains Ash.
"I think I see another buuuug!" cries Misty, "GROSS!"
"Maybe it's a...." starts Ash, then suddenly appears dressed in a cow's costume, "COW-TERPIE!"
"EHHH!" gasps Misty, the branch breaking and dropping her to the ground while Pikachu slams it's face into the dirt.

We're assuming something was lost in the translation, gentle Dodgers.

"That's not funny!" complains Misty angrily, "I know I saw a bug and it was right over there!"
And indeed it is, a funny yellow worm-looking Pokémon with a small horn on it's head. It crawls closer and a frightened Misty swings behind Ash, pressing her body close to his. Ash, being Ash, doesn't get it and simply steps forward, whipping out Dexter to find out more about this Pokémon.
"Weedle," explains Dexter,"The stinger on, this Pokémon's head, guarantees that any attacker, will get the point, right where it, hurts."
"A stinger, huh?" mumbles Ash, "There's a challenge."
"Why are you so excited about a bug with a stinger? Now make it go a-WAAAAYAH!" cries Misty, gripping Ash firmly by the back of his jacket. But Ash is having none of it (including what's on offer from Misty) and insists that he has to try and capture it, because he wants to be the greatest Pokémon Ma...blah blah blah blah. In any case, he's ready for action and prepares to capture the small worm, until he belatedly remembers that he has to weaken the thing first before he can capture it. He turns to Pikachu for help against this most deadly foe - a small yellow worm - but our chubby little rodent friend has plans of it's own, turning in for a cute little nap in it's cute little blanket with a cute little pillow.

Awwwwwwww that's so cute!

"Oh, taking a little nap, huh?" chuckles Ash, trying furiously to hide his embarrassment, "Well you snooze you lose, I've still got Pidgeotto and Metapod, and they give me the respect I deserve!" "You deserve to have your head examined," sighs Misty, then looks down in horror as once again her leg is used as a humping post by a bug, Weedle pumping up and down against her thigh. She is, understandably enough, horrified by this turn of events and speeds away, screaming for Ash to hurry up and capture the bloody thing. Ash's response? He hits a stock pose and spins around in front of a flashing background before releasing Pidgeotto, ordering the bird to use Gust Attack on it's much smaller opponent. Pidgeotto is more than willing to do this and sends Weedle flying with several flaps of it's wings. Flying high in the air, Pidgeotto swoops down and sends the shocked Weedle tumbling about all over the ground, dizzy and disorientated and ready to be captured.
"That's the way to do it!" laughs Ash happily as his Pokémon does all the work for him.

Meanwhile Misty has had enough, new bike or no, swiftly fading vision of Ash as a heroic rebel or not, she's getting the hell out of there. She strides angrily through the forest, muttering to herself about all the icky bug-types in the forest and how she wishes they'd all just bug off. As she rambles on angrily, she is watched from the trees, not by a bug but rather by an infinitely more dangerous opponent. Unsheathing it's sword, the sound captures Misty's attention and she turns just in time to see a screaming figure hurtling towards her with sword unsheathed.

A screaming, podgy, armoured skirt, samurai helmet wearing figure?

"Greetings oh shrieking maiden," greets the fat little samurai bitch, holding the edge of his sword mere centimetres from Misty's face, "Are you by chance the Pokémon Trainer who comes from Pallet?"
"Uhhhh.... no," quavers Misty, "That's not me."
"Alas," sighs the overly-dramatic little bastard, "My search continues."
He turns heroically away and stares at the ground, speaking to Misty a warning,"I advise you to refrain you from further shrieking while passing through this forest, unless your goal is to attract a horde of Beedrills."
And with that he walks away, sword sheathed and a butterfly net slung across his back.

We're through the looking glass here people.

"What a weird kid," sighs Misty, dropping to her knees and watching the fat little samurai bitch depart, "I wonder why he'd be looking for a Pokémon Trainer from.... UH! That's Ash!"

Indeed it is, and speaking of which Ash's Pidgeotto is doing a rather good job of putting a whupping on Weedle. It swoops in once again on it's opponent, which lowers it's head, glints it's horn then pounces forward to strike. Ash, seeing what's coming, warns Pidgeotto to avoid Weedle's Poison Sting Attack. The canny bird has already got this figured, however, and twists aside so that the attack misses, then turns and swoops down once again, sending Weedle flying and crashing to the ground where it lays hurt and disorientated, no longer able to fight back. Ready to capture it, Ash pulls out a Pokéball and enlarges it, preparing to throw it when he's suddenly interrupted by a sandalled wonder.
"Greetings, am I addressing the Pokémon Trainer who comes from Pallet?"
"I'm a Pokémon Trainer from Pallet," grumbles Ash, still ready to throw his Pokéball, "But I'm a little busy."
"I have found you at last," whispers Fat Samurai Bitch, withdrawing his sword to strike.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaassssssssshhhhhhh!!!!!" screams Misty, running into the clearing as Ash turns to see the podgy little Samurai leap high and bring his sword down mere centimetres from Ash's face.
"Th.. that sword doesn't scare me," stumbles Ash, hoping no one will notice the smell of shit coming from his mouth AND his pants, "There's no way you're stealing my Pokémon.
"I am no Pokémon thief," growls Fatty as Misty rushes up beside Ash.
"Who are you then?" she asks.
"I AM SAMURAI!" proclaims Samurai, pulling his sword away from Ash's face, "I am also shrewd, fearless and completely invincible in combat! I have been searching the forest for you!"
"What do you want from me?" asks Ash, not getting it as always.
"A Pokémon match!" announced Samurai, holding up his Pokéball, "Let us see who triumphs!"
Ash and Misty stand staring at the odd, socially maladjusted little punk before Pikachu calls attention to what Ash was doing earlier, wisely proclaiming, "Pika."
"AH!" gasps Ash, turning to see that Weedle is gone, no longer dizzy and disorientated by happily crawling away towards a nearby tree. In desperation Ash throws out his Pokéball but misses, hitting the tree instead and allowing Weedle to get away. Infuriated, he calls back Pidgeotto (who has been circling about in the air doing nothing all this time) before turning his angry gaze onto fatty.
"That Weedle only got away because YOU mixed me up," Ash complains with some justification.
"Don't blame your failure on me," smiles Samurai,"Your Pokémon handling is dim-witted and clumsy!"

Yeah, it's Ash's fault you pulled a sword on him before he could catch his Pokémon, isn't it Fatty.... it's probably also the cooks fault for leaving 18 pies out where anyone could come by and break in through the front door and fight off the guard dogs and smash through the protective glass to get at them. Silly fatty.

"What do you know about Pokémon, I bet I could beat you in a Pokémon Match blindfolded!" snaps Ash angrily.
"There is one way to find out," retorts Samurai, and both boys hold up their Pokéballs.
"Pikaaaa-chu," adds Pikachu sagely, wondrously speaking without even opening it's mouth nor nothing neither.

AND THE BATTLE IS ON!

Ash sends out Pidgeotto to do it's thing, but unfortunately for Ash it's thing appears to be sleeping on the job today, as it lies on the ground snoring away happily.
"ASH! Don't you know you have to rest your Pokémon once in a while!?!" Misty tells him, as Ash just stands there with a stupid look on his face - basically just being his normal self.
"Only a novice goes into battle with a pooped out Pokémon, your blunder will cost you dearly!" laughs Samurai before tossing out his own Pokémon,"Pinser! Assume Battle Mode!"
What emerges is a terrifying looking monster, an armour-plated Pokémon with skinny arms but massive clawed hands, thick, squat legs and a giant pair of studded Pincers on it's head. Instead of a mouth it has a oval hole with crushing sideways fangs.
"Woah, he's got a Pinser," Ash explains for those of us not keeping up at home, then whips out Dexter for an official description.
"Pinser, this fearsome Pokémon, uses it's powerful claws to put, the squeeze, on it's opponents."
Well, Ash reckons, Samurai's armour plated crushing machine looks tough, but surely it can't beat his own tuckered out, feathered flying machine! He orders the now awoken Pidgeotto to kick up a Sand Attack, but as fatty notes this is mere child's play, and a quick Tackle Attack from Pinser sees the all ready exhausted Pidgeotto out for the count.
"HAHAHAHAAAA! Your Pokémon is beaten!" gloats the fat little samurai bitch.
"Oh no!" gasps Ash,"Pidgeotto return!"
As Ash's Pokémon is called back into it's Pokéball, Fatty taunts him, asking him if he's ready to surrender now.
"I'm just getting warmed up!" snaps back Ash, and sends out his next Pokémon, Metapod!
With the dignity and snooty upturned nose of an English Butler, Metapod stares disdainfully at this common riffraff of a Pokémon it is expected to battle. But Fatty is undaunted by his opponents obvious superior class level and screams for Pinser to break it in half with it's pincers, proclaiming that this battle is all ready won.
"Metapod!" gasps Ash as he envisages his Pokémon being ripped in two by the powerful pincers of fatty's Pokémon. Misty insists that not even a bug deserves that and he should surrender, but Ash puts it all into an all or nothing gambit and calls for his Pokémon to harden. Light glints of Metapod's armoured skin as it hardens it's body, and when Pinser locks in tight around it with it's pincers, it is the studs on Fatty's Pokémon's pincers that shatter and not Metapod's body!
"So! Now who's the novice!" taunts Ash with the eager, bratty glee of a child.
"Pinser return!" cries Samurai, calling back his whupped Pokémon as Metapod sits still, looking imperious and upper-class.
"Graar!" graar's Fat Samurai Bitch, "Very clever!"
And with that he calls out his own Pokémon, Ash squinting his eyes to try and see through the red glare and discover the identity of the new challenger..... METAPOD!

Yes, standing back to back with dual imperious glares of imperial disdain, we find two Metapods locked into mortal combat! Truly this will be a battle to end all battles, can e'en the world itself survive the tumult and destruction these two glorious battlers will wreak in their never-ending quest for domination? But such concerns are not for Ash or his Fat Samurai Bitch of an opponent. They command their Pokémon to hardness, to maximum hardness! Light glinting of their hard, upthrust bodies as they..... OH GETCHA MINDS OUTTA DA GUTTA!!!!!!!!

For this is no battle of sexual innuendo, this is a battle fought not only on the physical plane, but on spiritual, mental and philosophical fronts as well. Both Pokémon refuse to let their stiff upper lip waver, both Pokémon stand back to back and let the sun shine down on them for hour after hour, their shadows turning and shifting as the day progresses, ignoring the cries of their respective trainers, their minds locked firmly on one thing and one thing only, cracking the imperious facade of the other. As Ash and Fatty square off, Misty and Pikachu take advantage of the sun to catch some rays, settling down on conveniently placed beach chairs and drinking delightful tropical refreshments, Misty wearing a little bikini that is going to get 4Kids in trouble with The Eff-Bee-Eye.

But as the animators tire of the magnificent details and effort of creating this mighty battle, we skip to another part of the forest and the antics of some of the other humans wandering about within.

Why yes it's Team Rocket, the sinister team who threatened to capture all the sick Pokémon in Pokémon Emergency! The same Team Rocket who tried to capture Pikachu in Ash Catches A Pokémon! But something is a little different today, this isn't the 'we're so bad it's good,' Team Rocket or the 'raaar we're evil criminals' Team Rocket. It's still Jesse, James and Meowth but they've changed somewhat, no longer forced to keep up an act for the kids they've been menacing their true personalities shine through.... they're being wacky!

Yes this is a Team Rocket we could come to love, a Team Rocket currently making their way through the forest inside of.... a tank made out of cardboard boxes! "I'm tired!" complains James.
"James quiet!" snaps Jesse angrily.
"But Jesse what's the point of dragging this tank around?" he complains again, both of them holding the tank over their heads with Meowth relaxing on top of it.
"To protect us from Beedrills," growls Jesse, "Ever been stung by one? It hurts!"
"Hey down dere, quit chattering!" Meowth speaks up,"Get a move on!" "What are you doing down there!" Jesse asks, looking up at the roof of the 'tank'.
"Why don't you come help us!?" asks James.
"Wish I could," laughs Meowth, settling back to relax once again, "I'm riding look-out."
"Well look out for this," growls Jesse, and her and James headbutt the tank so that Meowth goes flying off and crashing to the ground behind.
"HEY wait a second come back! MEEOOOWWWWTTTTTHHHHH!!!!" he screams, chasing after them.

Their tank has an R on the side.

Back at the battle of the century, a sweat Ash grits his teeth and calls for Metapod to harden a little more.
"Metapod," groans Fatty, "FULL POWER!"
Both Metapod continue to shun each other's gaze as a now fully clothed Misty stands watching on the sidelines.
"We could be stuck in this forest for the rest of our lives," she sighs, "Boys can be so stubborn."
"RRRRRRR!" rrrrrrr Ash and Fatty together, then slowly fall over backwards.
"Drnt gif ut!" gasps Ash through clenched teeth, his entire body locked into the slightly hunched over position he's been standing in for hours now.
"YOU TWO ARE MORE HARD-HEADED THAN YOUR METAPODS!" snaps Misty, who has taken all she can stand and can't stand no more, then hears a strange noise, asking,"Huh? What's that noise?"
"A Beedrill swarm approaches!" gasps Fatty, getting to his feet,"Our match must end, Metapod, RETURN!"
And thus there is no real winner of this the greatest battle in Pokémon history, although technically Fatty did call of his Pokémon first.

"Beedrill swarm!" gasps Ash as he looks up at the approaching, buzzing swarm of wasp-like Pokémon. But instead of calling back his Pokémon and running, despite the fact that he's all ready been chased by a swarm just a few days ago on the first day of his Pokémon journey, Ash pulls out Dexter to find out just what one of these crazy Beedrill critters really is.
"Beedrill," explains Dexter once again, "This Pokémon is an evolved form of, Weedle, following it's, Kakuna, stage. It's sting is, highly, poisonous."
"The Weedle that got away from you has informed the rest of it's kind!" screams Fatty, laying the blame firmly on Ash's shoulders despite the fact that it was his interference that caused the escape in the first place, and then he turns and runs his ass out of there, crying over his shoulder, "Good day!"

This Samurai.... is without HONOUR!

A Beedrill swoops down and scoops up Metapod before Ash can do anything, and his attempts to pull it back into it's Pokéball fail as the Beedrill evades the beam of the Pokéball and flies beyond the trees of the forest. Another Beedrill swoops at Ash but a quick Thundershock from Pikachu fries both it AND Ash, making for an effective rescue as well as some of that delightful physical comedy so popular amongst the French, Mexican and Tennessee demographics. As the blasted Beedrill flies dizzily off and Ash stands reeling from the attack, Misty grabs him by the arm and pulls him away, the two of them fleeing with Pikachu close behind while a concerned Ash pines away for his abducted Metapod and the Beedrill Swarm gives chase. Unfortunately for Fatty he's a fatty, and despite lifting his fat little legs high he's not going very fast. Misty, Ash and Pikachu are soon drawing close to him and the Beedrill Swarm is not far behind, but luckily for the kids it appears that these Pokémon can only fly in a straight-forward direction, as a quick dart behind some bushes takes them out of harms way and leaves the Beedrill flying along after nobody.

The three kids and one Pokémon sit panting for breath until Ash happens to look up and spots a large number of what looks to be a cross between Weedle and Beedrill hanging from a nearby tree. "A whole hive of Kakuna!" whispers the fat little samurai bitch in awe, as Ash once again goes to Dexter to give him the 411.
"Kakuna, a transitional stage, between Weedle and Beedrill. Kakuna remain inactive, until they evolve into, deadly Beedrills and, hatch."
The kids look down the length of the tree and notice a suspiciously green looking Kakuna, one that isn't hanging from the tree but sitting against the trunk... it's Metapod!
"Hey over there, it's Metapod!" laughs Ash happily until Misty slaps a hand over his mouth and pulls him down, embarrassing him with her superior strength.
"Keep your voice down!" she admonishes angrily, reminding him of the large amount of potentially deadly Pokémon they're currently facing.
But it's too late, and with a gleam of one Kakuna's eye the signal is given to evolve. Cracks form in the motionless Kakuna's backs and Beedrill's emerge from each one, swooping up into the air and turning to angrily face the terrified children. Once again Metapod is left behind as they turn and run for their lives, chased by the new swarm of Beedrill that draw ever closer, until a remarkable convenient log cabin comes into view.

"MY CABIN!" screams Fatty, "I think we can make it!"
They charge through the door and slam it shut behind them, several Beedrill ass-stingers pounded through the wood and pulling clear, giving them a view of the Beedrill that fly back and forth before the door, waiting for them to emerge. Inside the dark cabin the kids sit breathing heavily, Ash and Misty terrified out of their wits but ol' Fatty McFat-Fat smart enough to portion out the blame to Ash.
"Huuuh," he sighs, removing his binding costume and helmet and turning to face Ash with horrific helmet-hair and barely fitting singlet revealed, "I hope you've learned your lesson, novice! Your letting that Weedle escape almost cost our lives!"
"Take back that novice crack!" growls Ash.
"I do take it back, because not even a novice would abandon his own Pokémon as you did!"
Ash has no answer for that and he's obviously infuriated by the fact, his fist clenching and shaking as he whispers,"I tried to save Metapod."
"Chuuu," notes Pikachu placatingly.
"Your Metapod will pay for it's trainer's inexperience," growls Samurai, filled with the righteous indignation of those hiding their own guilt,"The other trainers from Pallet would never have been so irresponsible!"
"Other Trainers from Pallet?" asks Ash,"Have you fought Pokémon matches against Gary and the others?"
"Ahhh!" sighs Fatty, turning away as held cell images of battle flash before camera, "There were three spectacular matches, each more challenging than the last! Those trainers really knew how to raise Pokémon, even though I was defeated all three times I was inspired to redouble my own training! I have been eagerly preparing for that day when finally I would beat the next Pokémon trainer from Pallet!"
Throughout all this we are treated with views of Pinser being burned by a Charmander, Metapod being blasted away by a Squirtle and Pinser again getting a hiding from a Bulbasaur.
"So that's why you've been waiting around here for Ash to show up!" realises Misty.
"Compared to those other three, novice here is a joke!" taunts Samurai despite the fact that:

A) He didn't beat Ash.
B) He himself sucks, losing against all the other trainers.
C) He's fat.

"Huuuuuhhhh-uh!" replies Ash succinctly.
That night the kids settle down to sleep in the hopes the Beedrill will go away, and while Misty and Fatty sleep the sleep of the content or the very fat, Ash is having trouble sleeping. Maybe it's the fact that his Metapod is lost and alone out there or perhaps it's the fact that his sleeping bag has the name Satoshi written on it (Satoshi is the name of his Japanese Doppelganger, children) rather than Ash, but he can't sleep. "Metapod," he whispers.

The next day dawns with the Beedrill sleeping on their branches, Kakuna hanging from the trees and a still imperiously impassive Metapod resting against the trunk of the tree. Ash crawls through the grass keeping a sharp look-out for Beedrill and Weedle alike, but misses the cleverly camouflaged large, furry Scratch-Cat, Meowth! Leaping onto Ash's head, a happy Meowth screeches out entirely too loudly, "Do you know what Meowth's favourite game is?"
"GEDOFF!" growls Ash, tossing Meowth away, but the unconcerned Pokémon simply scratches Ash across the face, making him sniff then burst out crying as the happy Scratch-Cat quips.
"Scratch.... and sniffle."
"Guess who!" laughs a familiar voice, and looking up a large rocky outcropping Ash sees standing on the top a very familiar (and for the Dodgemasters very welcome) sight, it's Team Rocket!

"Prepare for trouble."
"Make it double."
"To protect the world from devastation."
"To unite all peoples within our nation."
"To denounce the e...."
"Nooo not again, not now!" yells Ash, enraging Jesse who was in the middle of her line.
"Never interrupt the Team Rocket motto!" she sniffs haughtily.
"But the Beedrill," insists Ash, but is interrupted himself by Jesse, who continues on.
"Ahem, to denounce the evils of truth and love."
"To extend our reach to the stars above."
"Jesse."
"James."
"Keep it down before you wake up the Beedrills!" insists Ash in terror, but is ignored by Team Rocket who know that the show must go on.
"Team Rocket blast off at the speed of light."
"Surrender now or prepare to fight."
"Meowth, dat's right!"


With that explosions of red and blue smoke mark the end of the motto, which is loud enough to wake up the Beedrill and send them soaring into the air. A terrified Ash looks up at the swarm as Jesse insists he hand over Pikachu.
"I don't have Pikachu with me and even if I did I wouldn't give it to you!" yells Ash and rushes away as Jesse and James leap down to the ground below.
Ash has a plan however, if he can get past the Beedrill they may be distracted by Team Rocket and attack them instead! Why this is just horrifying, simply horrifying, the Beedrill are lethal, if they attack Team Rocket then Jesse and James will DIE! They will DIE! Ash is willing to commit murder by proxy to save his Pokémon? Chilling.

The Beedrill swoop down but Ash ducks and rolls, which is known to protect against Beedrill swarms, fire and nuclear blasts. The Pokémon miss him and pull up short to face Team Rocket, who skid to a stop when they spot the lethal Pokémon. But Team Rocket have a plan! That tank they were carrying earlier is sure to come in handy now, and luckily they just happened to leave it lying on the ground here earlier and they quickly pick it up, only to discover a large number of Weedle set atop it, chewing away busily on their 'protection'. "MEEEEEOWWWWWWTH!! Dey're eating the tank!" gasps Meowth.
"Well we made it from paper to reduce the weight!" sobs James.
"Who knew!" agrees Jesse, trying to shift blame away.
"Numbskulls!" growls Meowth.
The Beedrill attack and Team Rocket run, while Ash slides up beside Metapod and pulls out his Pokéball.
"So there you are! Here, into the Pokéball, Metapod!" But the imperious Metapod is having none of it, softly shaking it's body in the negative, proclaiming,"Metapod, Metapod."
A Beedrill swoops in for the attack, having remained behind, and Ash has no choice but to scoop it up and run with it, telling it that he didn't abandon it, he just got sidetracked and it's all Samurai's fault and.... and the stupid punk trips over!

Yes the terrifying mechanics of placing one foot in front of the other to achieve locomotion is beyond Ash's capabilities and like the punk that he is he's tripped up! Metapod goes flying and crashes into the ground while Ash himself skids face-forward along the grass.
"No, it wasn't Samurai's fault," Ash admits at last, "It was my fault. If I was a better Pokémon Trainer I'd stop making all these excuses, from now on I swear that I'll never run away and leave my friends behind again. No more excuses."

Well isn't that lovely and mature of Ash, gentle Dodgers, haven't we all learnt a valuable lesson about owning up and....... BOLLOCKS! It WAS Samurai's fault and Ash ISN'T to blame! The fat little bastard is responsible for Weedle getting away, he ran away when the Beedrill's attacked, the Beedrill dodged Ash's best efforts to get Metapod back, the Kakuna evolved and Ash would have died if he'd stuck around and Team Rocket got involved when he risked life and limb to return for Metapod. It's all a bunch of new age CRAP! This terrifying example that is still taught in schools today is that it's mature to own up to mistakes even when they aren't your fault because no one likes to hear excuses. Well you can go piss up a rope you PC bastards! I say that if you didn't do anything wrong then you stick up for your rights and you say NO! It isn't my fault and I'm not going to say it was because you can't be bothered to find out the truth of the matter!

Ahem. Yes.

But regardless, Ash has wrongly taken the blame, and Metapod is somewhat moved by that, it's imperious gaze remaining but betrayed by an enlargement and wobbling of the eye. As Ash steps forward and picks up Metapod, Beedrill attacks again, swooping down for a Twin Needle Attack as Fat Samurai Bitch, Misty and Pikachu arrive protected by a mosquito net. But Ash doesn't run, preferring to bend over Metapod to protect it, willing to take a needle attack to his spine that will either paralyse or kill him.

The boy ain't too bright, is he.

But Metapod is having none of it turns it's imperious gaze into a determined squint before somehow leaping high into the air (it has neither arms nor legs) and smashing into Beedrill, shattering it's drill-hands and sending it flying off in terror. Ash catches Metapod as it falls and stares in shock at the massive gash down it's belly! Is Metapod mortally wounded! Will we see our first death on Pokémon? Well no, because a white glow indicates not death by rather, evolution! the now empty exterior shell of Metapod gives way to the winged, soft body of a Butterfree!
"Freeeeeeee! Freeeeeeeee! Freeeeeeeee!" freeeeeeeee's Butterfree, it's call instantly grating on everybody's nerves.
"Oh it's so beautiful!" gasps Misty.
"Pika!" adds Pikachu.
"Butterfree," explains Dexter, making an unprecedented number of appearances in today's show,"One week after Caterpie evolves into Metapod, it again evolves into Butterfree."
While Dexter explains this, Butterfree 'freeees' and 'freeees' and 'freeees' along growing more and more annoying as time goes by. But then the Beedrill swarm returns and the kids are royally screwed once again, except Butterfree and wobbly-eyed Ash are sure they can take them on. The increasingly annoying Pokémon flies into the air and, at Ash's command let's loose with it's sleep powder, knocking out all of the Beedrill, the Weedle feasting on Team Rocket's tank and Team Rocket themselves!

Ash has won! He knocked out a whole swarm of Pokémon and what's more he's gained the respect of a fat little socially maladjusted butterball of a trainer, who respectfully tells Ash, "You were able to handle your Butterfree so well....."

That's history in the making gentle Dodgers, that was the first line that Dodgemaster Lex ever heard, causing her to laugh and annoy Dodgemaster's Brandon and Tim who were just trying to enjoy this amusing little 'childrens' cartoon. Thus was born Dodge and from it, eventually Pokemopolis.

"....just after it evolved," continued Fatty, "Most impressive!" "Pikachu!" agrees Pikachu.
Butterfree, by way of celebration, swoops about screeching and squawing and "freeee'ing" away like crazy. With each and every passing second our annoyance and hatred grows and we miss Metapod more and more.

But is Butterfree the worst Pokémon ever? Not quite, though it does come close, but that glorious title belongs to another that we will meet in 24 episodes.

But for now, the fourth episode is coming to an end with Ash, Misty and Pikachu standing on the edge of The Viridian Forest with their newfound friend, Fat Little Samurai Bitch. Suddenly he's all palsy and friendly and everything, telling them how to make their way from here to Pewter City. Ash then insists they finish off their Pokémon Battle but ol' Fatty isn't as stupid as he is ugly and begs off, claiming that compared to Ash HE is the novice, but he will continue to train and battle and one day they shall meet again. Hahaha! Yeah, see you in the opening credits of the Orange Islands episodes fatty!

So the kids head off for a meeting with destiny and a tall, tanned and toned Gym Leader who will capture the hearts of many a fair maiden in the future, except that none of them will be on the show!

But no episode will be complete from now on without finding out what happened to the increasingly beloved Team Rocket, and we return to the forest to find Jesse, James and Meowth hanging from the branch of a tree wrapped in paper and cardboard to look like Kakunas. They are surrounded by the real deal and deadly Beedrill, all of them sleeping now as Team Rocket try to figure out just how the hell they're going to get out of there... as well as finding someone to lay blame on for the situation they now find themselves in.
"Do you have any more bright ideas?" snaps James angrily to Jesse.
"Well unlike you at least I have ideas!" retorts Jesse.
"Yeah and they're all bad!" argues Meowth.
Their arguing, of course, awakens the Kakuna and Beedrill and the latter rise up with their stingers and drills ready. The camera pulls away from the forest as we hear cries of, "Owowowowowowowowow!"

Which just goes to show the old adage is true, gross physical violence is always funnier when it's happening to somebody else.

BEST QUOTES

"Dey're eating the tank!" "Well we made it from paper to reduce the weight."

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