ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
613: The Needs Of The Three!	619: Agunomu, Yukushi, Emuritto!	Team Galactic Climax 1/2			The Lake Spirits get caught, Pokémon Hunter J gets murdered!	Masters of Fashionable Disguise	Karma delayed isn't necessarily Karma denied

Last episode the twerps encountered Team Galactic once again and stumbled upon a strange plot by the zombie-like Cyrus that in some way involved the three Legendary Lake Spirits Mesprit, Uxie and Azelf. Unknown to the twerps after Galactic's getaway and the destruction of all the International Police's Data on them - Cyrus has sent Pokémon Hunter J after the Lake Spirits as he prepares to make his ominous new world. Now the twerps find themselves in a shimmering light meeting the three Pokémon, which flee in terror from the reaching crimson tentacles of some strange eldritch horror.... and the twerps wake up in their bedroom at the Pokémon Centre, sweating and freaking out after sharing the same dream. The time has come to answer...



J's Ship appears above Lake Valor, opening the bomb-bay doors to reveal THE GALACTIC BOMB (goddamn does Team Galactic do things right!) as on the shore, Gary Oak contacts Professor Rowan an-

GARY OAK!

It seems that while the twerps are stumbling through destiny, peripheral non-destined characters are doing their best to actually accomplish something structured! Rowan is in contact with Gary and others at the lakes where the Spirits reside, preparing to halt J's attempts to capture the Pokémon. Unfortunately for Gary, as he brings out his Electivire, Galactic Lieutenant Saturn gets the drop on him with Toxicroak. A battle ensues, Toxicroak vs. Umbreon... and Umbreon gets its ass kicked! Meanwhile, J has her men release THE GALACTIC BOMB and the massive.... uhh... bomb! drops into the lake and explodes in a sphere of light. At the Pokémon Centre, Ash drops his spoon (he has no bowl in front of him, just a cup!) and clutches his head in pain - he's just felt Azelf in pain.

In the lake, a smug Saturn tells Gary what is happening - the Galactic Bomb is made from a piece of the meteor taken from Veilstone City. It has opened a hole in space to the other dimension in which Azelf and the other spirits actually reside - the lake is essentially the "doorway" to that dimension.

In the Centre, Ash has contacted Rowan who finally brings the kids up to speed on what is going on. Rowan also gets contact from the other two lakes, the portals are opening there as well, and Carolina rightfully suspects that "those kids" are involved.

At Acuity, J flies by on the back of Salamence and Gary tries to stop her with Electivire, only for Toxicroak to quickly and brutally put paid to that. Saturn warns him to stay out of this, while other Grunts send in their Golbat as Azelf is revealed. Golbat's attempt to Supersonic it only to be knocked out of the sky by Azelf's powers.... and then it happens!

Azelf's attack and J's capture beam pass directly through each other and J is almost knocked off of Salamence.... but Azelf has been turned inanimate! As it freezes in the sky and falls onto a floating platform and surrounded by glass, Ash feels the pain of the capture.... and Cyrus watches it all from Team Galactic's Base, narrating for our benefit the legend that if one of the Lake Spirits falls, the others must appear together to attempt to restore the balance.... and Cyrus means to capture them.

In the Pokémon Centre, Ash and the others insist that they have to try and help the Spirits, despite Rowan's stern insistence that holy fuck you guys you're little fucking children stay the fuck out of this! They ignore him and rush out the door... and Cynthia pulls up in a jeep and tells them to hop in!

Shit is getting real, now!

At Acuity, Saturn collects the container holding Azelf and warns off Gary from trying to interfere further.... and then Uxie and Mesprit arrive!



Shit is REALLY getting real!

They spot the captured Azelf and prepare to attack, but then Jupiter and Mars arrive, their Skuntank and Purugly attacking. The Spirits dodge them and then Golbat Supersonics, but as they try to flee J gets in their way. They blast Future Sight into the air as Uxie is captured by J, and Mesprit blasts J and cracks her visor before she captures it with her Inanimate Beam too... and just like that, all three Spirits have been captured.

Cynthia explains to the twerps as they drive towards Mount Coronet that they're on their way to meet Looker, who has tracked Team Galactic there. She says that if they want to help the Spirits, they have to deal with Team Galactic.

At Acuity, Team Galactic and J ignore Gary as J is thanked for her part and is told her payment has been made. Truly professional and callous to the last, J simply returns to her Flying Ship on the back of Salamence and prepares to depart. She's done it again, gotten away scott-free again - the cruellest, most heartless and DANGEROUS person the twerps have met to date, free to leave again and continue her horri-



OH YES! THAT'S IT! THAT'S WHAT YOU GET! THAT'S WHAT YOU GET!

Uxie and Mesprit's Future Sight returns, smashing twin bolts of lightning through the ship! It dips and falls ponderously towards the twirling whirlpool in the lake where the Galactic Bomb exploded. J screams at her men to get the ship under control again but too late! Too late! It crashes into the whirlpool and is caught in the pull, dragged into the water as the glass windows shatter under the pressure and millions of tons of water crash inside as men scream. The Ship falls deeper and deeper into the lake (and perhaps, the other dimension where the Spirits reside?) as we see J's cracked visor drifting free, and then the blasted engines explode and a huge burst of water is rocketed clear from the ship. It's the end of Pokémon Hunter J, and a more fitting end there never was. After an entire season of her easily and callously defeating all efforts to capture her - after her deadly competence and indifference to any form of morality, after stymied attempt after stymied attempt to give her comeuppance.... Pokémon Hunter J dies, impotent and enraged, roaring useless commands to terrified lackeys as her ship groans under the relentless pressure of millions of pounds of water and crushes the ship and her inside it. She dies a horrible, miserable death - there is no escape, no last minute redemption or arrest or any of the usual bullshit. She dies. Unlamented.

A more fitting end there never was.

Galactic leave in their helicopter leaving behind a useless and frustrated Gary, and speaking of useless and frustrated.... Team Rocket! Sailing in their Happy Buddha Face Meowth Balloon in search of Team Galactic, their strategy of "fly around and hope they spot them" isn't working too well UNTIL Meowth spots a very familiar face.... it's.... LUNCH BOX GUY!



Ecstatic to see Looker again since they've either forgotten he is a Policeman or because they consider him a buddy now, they rush up in delight and he has to quiet them down, whispering that his name is Looker (they consider him the Boss of Lunches!). He tells them he is looking for Galactic and they leap up in shock, and he has to drag them down and growl at them that he wants revenge for the humiliation they heaped on him when he introduced the virus into the International Police Headquarters Database.

Meanwhile, Rowan is telling Cynthia and the twerps that Gary is safe and he has (belatedly) contacted Officer Jenny. She reminds the twerps of the mural in the Celestic Ruins, and warns them that Team Galactic is preparing to call forth Dialga and Palkia and put the Gods of Time and Space under human control.

In the base, a delighted Charon is programming things at Cyrus' orders, dropping segments of the red chain into the vats holding the inanimate Lake Spirits. Mesprit, Uxie and Azelf awaken with the segments fixed in place on their heads.... and then shit REALLY gets real!



The fuck!

Cynthia pulls to a stop, the twerps (and Pikachu and Piplup!) are gone, stretched long and then disappearing into white light - she can’t believe what she's seen, the twerps have been.... summoned?

In Team Galactic's Base, Charon is delighted, they have tapped into a core substance of the universe and that core substance is.... three kids, a fat yellow rat and a bossy penguin!?!

Even Team Galactic are shocked to see the twerps there, but Charon quickly gets over it and cackles throatily again. The twerps spot the Spirits and Ash demands to know what they've done... but there are more important things to worry about! Croagunk emerges from its Pokéball uncalled for, sensing that Toxicroak is near. Saturn is delighted, Toxicroak has been looking forward to finishing the gutting that it started, and he calls it out. Mars and Jupiter call out Purugly and Skuntank as well and the twerps prepare to fight... and then the rumble is called off - by Cyrus!

Oh fuck!

Outside, Looker is trying to figure out how to get into the Galactic Headquarters when Jesse and James show off their talent for disguises (real disguises, not "let's put on a pair of glasses and fool a retarded 10 year old!" disguises) by revealing Team Galactic uniforms and hairdos - even Meowth is acting like a "proper" Meowth! Looker is impressed, and then chuckles that he is known as a master of disguise as well.

Yeah, changing those eyebrows works wonders.

Inside, Cyrus' role as the head of Team Galactic has been revealed (Ash doesn't get it, of course) but he insists there be no fighting. He growls at Saturn, Mars and Jupiter that fighting is the most frightful by-product of the human heart. Jupiter is practically jumping up and down - so desperate to beat up the little kids - but a glare from Zombie Cyrus shuts her up like a good guard-dog. He tells them that humanity will never advance as long as the human heart is ruled by emotions, and it is time to tell the twerps what this is all about - he created Team Galactic, this is their Headquarters, and he intends to end the old world of discord and rebuild a new, perfect world.

Ash is furious that Cyrus lied to people like him and Cynthia (the brutal beatings and possible murders are one thing... but LYING!?!) while Dawn refuses to "give up the rage in her heart" as Cyrus insists, not while he is abusing Pokémon like this. He will not give up the Lake Spirits, and since the twerps are obviously in some way important, he will not let them go. They're surrounded by Grunts, Saturn, Mars and Jupiter, and the smart thing to do would be to surrender and hope to find another way out.

But this is the twerps we're talking about, so it's time to Rumble! This time, the stakes are all of existence!

BEST QUOTES

"That's nice. But to us...." "....you're the Boss of Boxed Lunches!"

Previous Episode Next Episode Episode List