ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
611: Sticking With Who You Know!	617: Pikachu Potchama Kuttsukanai de!	Straight Up Gay Fucking			Pikachu and Piplup fall in love with each other	Want to commercialise forced gay sex	If your Pokémon don't like each other, don't try and force them to have sex

Today finds the twerps moving through a lovely looking scenic town on their way to Sunyshore. They head into the Pokémon Centre where Ash oddly BLURTS out a hello before Brock launches himself at Nurse Joy. He goes on a dramatic romantic outburst and gets asspunched by Croagunk before he can be arrested for creepy-ass disturbing sexual harassment. Ash gives no fuck and tells Pikachu they should go get in some training after they settle in to freeload a room at the Centre.

Outside, Piplup isn't looking where it is going and walks straight into Pikachu, knocking it over and causes it to let rip with a blast of electricity. Piplup is furious as Pikachu tries to apologise, but Dawn points out that it is to blame and it should go easy on Pikachu, which did nothing wrong. Piplup's pride won't let it give it up though, and it squeaks angrily at Pikachu and then.... falls in love!

The fuck?

Hearts fill his eyes as he gazes longingly at Pikachu, and Pikachu's own eyes suddenly fill with lust as he gasps out his love for Piplup, and the two embrace as the twerps are left wondering what the fuck is going on.

Well.... I guess like Lyra with Khoury before them, Pikachu and Piplup have decided to settle and are....



As they rub up against each other and the twerps try to figure it out, the answer is not that far away. In a ramshackle, makeshift laboratory in the forest, notes of paper are covering the floor as a bedraggled Professor checks out his equipment and tosses notes around complaining about the scientific impossibility of his experiments not working. As he rants, his harried assistants try to clean up after him and ask him to calm down, and he turns his rants on them instead. His name is Professor Kodama and his three assistants are... Team Rocket! And he knows they're Team Rocket even though they're wearing suits and glasses and labcoats! He gave them a job because they were penniless, but Jesse is sick and tired of cleaning up after him. Suddenly James "remembers" that he needs to do some grocery shopping and Meowth goes to help him as they gleefully escape, leaving a horrified Jesse behind. Kodama asks her to clean up "those papers" indicating the huge mess of crap lying all about the makeshift lab, but the trouble is an angry Quagsire and Magnemite are getting ready to throw down on each other.

Don't you hate it when that happens!

Meanwhile, Piplup and Pikachu are still trying to work out the mechanics of homosexual cross-species sex.



Ash and Dawn try to pull their horny, lust-struck Pokémon apart and struggle their puny little arms with all their might till they finally pull Pikachu an inch or so away.... and Pikachu zaps the fuck out of all of them before going back to embracing a delighted Piplup. Brock has the idea of recalling Piplup to its Pokéball and it works to separate them temporarily, but then Pikachu falls over backwards and Piplup re-emerges on its own and they go back to hugging.

But Brock has a plan! Get them to back they asses up!

The fuck, Brock?

He's decided that their love is like a magnet, and they'll always connect while facing each other so if they can struggle to turn them around so their backs are against each other they'll be repelled, just like a magnet!

Ash and Dawn are really relying on BROCK for expert opinion on love?

With a struggle they manage to turn the two Pokémon around and hold the lovestruck Pokémon facing them instead, delighted that it worked... till Pikachu and Piplup leap out of their hands, turn around and go back to hugging. They decide to pick up Piplup and Pikachu and carry them together to see Nurse Joy, spotted by James and Meowth as they bring their groceries back. Meowth comments on the "action down dere" which James apparently completely missed, thinking the behaviour was just "twerpish". But Meowth insists they follow the twerps and try and get a good luck as the homosexual cross-species lust-sex.

Oh like you wouldn't.

Back at the Pokémon Centre, the twerps discover a bunch of other trainers and their love-struck Pokémon. A Squirtle and a Raichu, a Marill and a Luxio... even a Mareep and an Octillery!



Oh that's just nasty.

The little boys and girls don't understand why the Pokémon are stuck together, and Brock suddenly realises something - it's all Water and Electric Types getting "stuck" together. Nurse Joy confirms that other types in the Centre aren't being effected, and watching from the window, Meowth thinks the Professor's experiments are working... and James hasn't got a clue what the hell he is walking about.

Back at the Lab, Kodama is still working while the Quagsire and Magnemite glare at each other. Meowth approaches the ruffled Professor and asks if his experiment is designed to "stick" Pokémon together and Kodama snorts that this is a ridiculous idea... he's trying to make them like each other.

You couldn't take them to the beach or something?

Apparently his half-baked machine - the Affinity Enabler - is designed to do just this, which Jesse thinks is a stupid idea. James shushes her (taking his own life into his hands) while Meowth grumbles about the poor marketability of the name and Kodama explains that the Enabler has converted the Pokémon move "Attract" into a Digital Format and transmits it from the satellite on his roof.

Jesse thinks he is insane, while Kodama goes on about how the "Attract" signal is working on Pokémon of the same gender, which is truly remarkable... he just isn't sure how yet.

Well for one thing, it marks you for death by the Republican Party.

Kodama is sure he can make it work though, and who wouldn't trust the word of a man who makes Pokémon into homosexuals and who looks like this:



He just engenders a deep sense of trust and comfort, doesn't he Gentle Dodgers!

His Quagsire and Magnemite try to fight again until he snaps at them to cut it out, and explains to a blasted Team Rocket (caught in the way of a Magnemite attack) that he loves both his Pokémon very much and wants them to love each other.

....in the butt?

He decides that the solution is more power and cranks up the Affinity Enabler, and in the Pokémon Centre the affected Pokémon squeeze together in love even tighter, freaking out Ash and Dawn. Brock thinks about it, noting that Water and Electric Types might get on well but don't work well together in Battles.... and so maybe this sudden out-of-nowhere homosexual lust between a penguin and a rat ISN'T just happening naturally.

In the lab, Meowth and James are explaining to Jesse what they saw in the Pokémon Centre. Meowth tells them that he wants to steal the machine once it is up and operating properly. Why? Because they can use it to make Pikachu love Meowth, and then it won't attack them, and he can cart it away upside down swinging above his head!



Meowth, you are.... you are an odd Pokémon.

Magnemite and Quagsire go back to wrassling, and Magnemite is knocked into the machine and shuts it off, causing the digital signal to disappear and.... oh dear.



The morning after the night before!

The twerps are relieved, as are all the other trainers whose Pokémon are no longer trying to make it with each other. Stupidly they proclaim that everything is back to normal and all good now, before an angry Kodama switches the machine back on and everyone goes back to canoodling.

One of the small boy trainers says maybe it is for the better, and notes that he and his friend's Pokémon never got on before all this, always arguing etc. So now that they're trapped in a mindless lust-filled squeeze and won't respond to any other external stimuli, surely this is better!

The fuck, small boy?

Brock continues his sleuthing, and figures that whoever is doing this probably intended to make Water Pokémon and Electric Types get on, probably because he has Pokémon of those types that don't get on. Nurse Joy speaks up, mentioning Professor Kodama and his nearby lab and his crazy-ass experiments and his Quagsire and Magnemite that don't get on.

Good lord, woman, are you a retard? You're only bringing this up NOW!?!

They head to the lab where they find Kodama, and show him Piplup and Pikachu, and his reaction is sure to encourage feelings of relief and security from the twerps.



Lord in fuck, what the hell is wrong with this sweating madman's fingers?

He is delighted, his experiment is a success! He shows them the Affinity Enabler, delighted that his research has paid off.... but why aren't Quagsire and Magnemite getting on? He tells them he is working on it (one's a robot and the other is a sexless lump of happy water-flesh blob!), and then Jesse and James slide in. They're not recognised by the twerps of course, thanks to their clever disguise of having exactly the same faces and hair but wearing different clothes. They tell them to move along while they continue working with Kodama on the machine. Meowth flicks the Enabler on and off over and over, causing Pikachu and Piplup to fall in and out of lust frequently, delighting Kodama who sees it as proof that his machine works. Jesse and James try to sneak away until Kodama bluntly calls them Team Racket... Rocket! And even the twerps can figure that one out, so.... it's Motto Time!

"We're busted so off with my disguise!"
"There's lots of time left to feed you more lies!"
"On the wind!"
"Past the stars!"
"My how time flies!" screams Meowth.
"Bringing chaos at a breakneck pace!"
"Dashing all hope and putting fear in its place."
"A rose by any other name's just as sweet."
"When everything's worse, our work is complete."
"Jesse!"
"And it's James!"
"Meowth! Dat's a name!"
"Putting goody do-gooders in their place."
"We're Team Rocket!"
"And in your face!" they finish together.

Wobbuffet disappears, having apparently only appeared purely to salute and say his name. Meowth hits a button to cause the roof to smash in as the Happy Buddha Face Meowth Balloon hauls up the Affinity Enabler. Kodama leaps on in a panic and Team Rocket are delighted, they can use him to work out the problems with the machine. As he scrabbles about on the Enabler, Kodama switches it off and Pikachu and Piplup drop to the ground clear-headed but confused. However Kodama accidentally switches it back on with a wild flailing of his foot and sends them back into a lustful embrace. Team Rocket grab them up with a mechanical arm and begin sailing away, the twerps unable to do anything because apparently all their other Pokémon are away attending a Time-Share Presentation or something.

But then Magnemite and Quagsire appear on the scene, working together as Magnemite is tossed by Quagsire to Kodama. He grabs onto it and it lowers slowly towards the ground with him, blasting the Affinity Enabler as they drop. It is cut loose and crashes to the ground, the signal ending and Pikachu and Piplup coming to inside Team Rocket's basket. Meanwhile, Quagsire uses Water Gun to slow Kodama and Magnemite's descent, and he lands safely, while Brock ponders if maybe they never actually hated each other but were just getting in some practise all along?

No, that's a stupid theory, Brock, that makes no goddamn sense. Shut up.

Nobody else pays attention to his dumb idea either, and Pikachu and Piplup shout out and wave to Ash and Dawn from the balloon. Ash suddenly remembers he has other Pokémon and calls out Staraptor. It flies up and they leap out onto its back while Team Rocket just stand there and watch them go and don't do anything about it.

Well... they kinda have no excuse to complain, really. Piplup and Pikachu use a Combo Attack to destroy the Balloon, and Team Rocket are sent blasting off again as per usual, with Jesse furious, Meowth resigned and James aggravated. The only one happy, it seems, is Carnivine!



And Wobbuffet, of course! Always Wobbuffet!

Back at Kodama's lab, Nurse Joy watches the relieved trainers and their now lust-free Pokémon heading away (I bet that small boy who said the forced homosexuality was a GOOD thing is feeling a little silly now!) from the Pokémon Centre. Kodama still doesn't understand why the Affinity Enabler didn't work on Quagsire and Magnemite, and Brock suggests it is because they are also a Ground Type and Steel Type respectively (and don't have genders!).

Where did you get your Professor-ship, Kodama? Tijuana?

Eager to get back to his research, Kodama has a new area he wants to experiment on. Luckily for him, nobody has any concerns with his reckless endangerment of a wide area around his lab of unsuspecting people and Pokémon. The twerps say their goodbyes, saying that they're glad that Pikachu and Piplup are back to "normal".



Until... of course, the loneliness and cold of nights on the mountain start to eat away at them!

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