ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
588: Classroom Training!	594: Torenazu Sukuru no Suzuna-sensei!	Quiz Whiz Not Worth A Piss			The twerps meet Zoey's "friend" Candice, and Ash fails another academic test	Too cool for school	Academic excellence needs real world applications

Today finds the twerps..... no! Zoey! It's Zoey at Snowpoint City, or rather just outside it. And now here comes the twerps, meeting up with her at the hill overlooking the city. Ash shows off his latest Gym Badge to her, and Dawn tells Zoey she can't wait to see Snowpoint City, the place where Zoey was born! Hey, looks like you learn something new every day, you never really stop your....



They head down the peaceful and quiet streets, Zoey telling them how much she loves the peace and quiet of the snow... at which point an Abomasnow bursts out of the trees screaming and roaring. Glameow jumps in the way, and Brock thinks it must be a wild Pokémon, but a girl sitting up in the tree laughs that he's wrong. Zoey knows her, and the girl... spots Dawn and leaps down uncomfortably close to her, drawing closer and closer to the nervous little girl as sparkles light up her eyes and she demands to know where Dawn got her cute outfit.

Her own is bizarre, stiff pigtails, a blueish/green sweater and a brown skirt almost as short as Dawn's. Finally the girl - at Zoey's insistence - introduces herself as Candice, the.... Gym Leader of Snowpoint City!

Ash is delighted; he wants to challenge her to a Gym Battle, which in turn delights her as she rarely gets challenged due to the remote, quiet nature of Snowpoint City. Brock says he knows what that is like, and it is explained that he used to be Gym Leader at Pewter in the Kanto Region. Candice asks if he is on holiday and he tells her that his horrible, horrible, horrible family is currently running things while he gets in some breeder training.... snicker.

Candice points out a building up ahead, the Pokémon Trainer's School, where Zoey and Candice went to school (which Dawn decides is why Zoey calls Candice Miss Senior, even though.... what?) and where Candice now teaches due to the quiet nature of her Gym. She asks Ash how many badges he has, then asks him if she could use him as an example for her students. Ash - always the one track mind - asks if she means via a Gym Battle, but she says she actually wants him to teach an-ahahaha.



Ahahahahaha.

AHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Anyway, she'd like Ash to teach a claAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! to teach a claHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA to teachehehehehehe to teach a hahaha to teach a class.

Hehehe.

She also wants Zoey to get her "kiai" on, and Zoey shows Dawn that she still hasn't earned her 5th ribbon, with Candice giving her some "encouragement" by pointing out that she can't quite seem to get that final ribbon, so it's time to get that kiai on!

What the fuck is kiai?

Even Dawn wants to know, and Zoey offers a somewhat lame explanation, it seems that Candice wants Zoey to battle... so it's... fighting spirit? Why not just say,"Harden up, motherfucker!" like God intended?

Anyway, at the Pokémon School, small children are being taught in various classes, but Candice also has classes for older trainers who for one reason or another (like having to get a fucking JOB!) had to interrupt their Pokémon Journeys and are trying to get caught up. And this includes.... some very familiar faces!



Candice introduces Ash to the class, much to Team Rocket's chagrin, and Candice (whose short skirt looks even more ridiculous from front on) has Ash show off his six badges. The adult trainers are astonished, including a huge bald dude in a leather jacket, and as Ash offers useless mottos like "The best defence is a good offense!", Team Rocket whisper amongst themselves that his mottos are almost as boring as he is, Wobbuffet agreeing with a quietly whispered,"....wobbuffet...."

Candice gives the class the assignment of following along with Ash, and asks Dawn to take part as well. Ash sits down next to a fat middle-aged man called Jeremiah who works as a Poketch Representative, and has a Skuntank (Eek the Cat!) as a Pokémon. Dawn settles down next to a nervous James, and Brock suggests to Zoey that Candice may be secretly testing Ash ahead of their Pokémon Battle.

Candice announces that they will now be taking part in a quiz, freaking out Ash who has a bad history with these things. However, when the first question references Pikachu, he instantly hits his buzzer and confidently proclaims the answer is,"Electric Type!" only to be told he is wrong. Jeremiah chuckles and tells him that he shouldn't be too overconfident, as that can be disastrous in a Pokémon Battle. James - eager and excited to take part - loudly proclaims that he was known as The Prince of Quizzes as a lad, and shines brightly with overconfidence of his own, a bit too brightly for Jesse and Meowth's tastes.

He notes that speed is key but you have to be able to extrapolate the likely question from the first visual and verbal cues. Candice agrees, and continues the question by saying that Pikachu is a Mouse Pokémon, so-

James interrupts by buzzing in, declaring that the answer is Tiny Mouse Pokémon.... but he's wrong! He's shocked, surely the question would be in regards to a pre-evolution, but Candice continues the question - Pikachu is a Mouse Pokémon, so what type of Pokémon is Cyndaquil?

Oh come on!

The answer, of course, is Fire Mouse Pokémon, and Jeremiah is the one to get it. The next question, however, has Jeremiah slap the buzzer instantly as Abra is shown, and gives the answer "24 Hours."

What the hell?

Jeremiah explains that an Abra will sleep for 18 hours, so how long will the smell a Stunky produces last?

What the Christing fuck?

Brock is amazed, and Zoey says he must study really hard.... wait, what? How would that let you guess the unrelated back-half of the question in advance? The next question seems straightforward, what is a powerful move that Meowth can learn? Meowth and James should both know this, but are hesitating over the buzzer as they try to figure out what the twist to the question is. Jeremiah hits the buzzer and gives the answer as Payday, infuriating Jesse who shakes the disguised Meowth in a rage.

Baldy in a leather jacket with a Diglett mysteriously sitting at table level asks Candice to explain what this quiz has to do with battling. She explains that being able to predict things in advance is a major advantage in battling, as it frees the Pokémon to concentrate on battling and leaving the strategising to the trainer. Brock agrees with her, but outside later on, Ash lies on the lawn pissed off at how badly things went while Brock tries to encourage him by pointing out his true strength lies in his battling.

Jeremiah steps up and says that he was surprised at how little Ash seems to know (haha!) despite having six Gym Badges. Ash insists he'll do better next time and Jeremiah rather nicely insults him by saying that he hopes so. He waddles off, and Brock tells Ash that he is a genius when it comes to battling, which is something we've always known, because he sure as fuck is dumb as a brick otherwise.

Meanwhile, Zoey and Dawn are in a shed where Zoey is showing Dawn a worn old cushion next to a catflap where Piplup is running in and out in delight. Candice shows up, followed by Ash and Brock, and Candice tells them that this is where it all started for Candice and Zoey.

.....fucking?

As a small(er) young girl, Zoey found Glameow in a cardboard box in an alley in the snow, and took it home to her parents who forced her to take it to the Pokémon Centre. Instead, she hid it in the shed at the Training School, but when the Headmaster found out he tried to force her to drop it in the Pokémon Centre too. Candice stepped in on her behalf and the Headmaster saw reason, acknowledging that one small girl couldn't raise a Pokemon herself but with the help of a very slightly older girl, they were bound to succeed. He agreed that Glameow could stay if the two of them worked on raising it, and so they did. Candice goes on to explain that Zoey's stubborn streak held her in good stead as she focused on being a Coordinator and had no time for people who "didn't take things seriously" by trying to do both. Dawn and Ash remember this well, but the shared laughter as Zoey's expense comes to a quick end when Dawn tells Candice that she was relieved not to have won her Fifth Ribbon recently as it makes her feel like she and Zoey are on an even footing at the moment. Candice's reaction is, to put it lightly, far from serene. She insists that as rivals that she can't have an attitude like that, where is her kiai!?!

Brock tells Ash that he suspected Candice might have a hot streak to her and get intense in a win or lose situation, and Ash should look out for this in his Pokémon Battle.

Meanwhile, Team Rocket are wiggling their asses (if you got it, flaunt it!) staring out the window. It's recess, which means playtime, which means people have let their guards down, which means it is time for them to steal some Pokémon.

The Headmaster steps in and asks them how they're enjoying their training, and gives them a tour of the school's Pokémon stocks, divided into type and evolution. As he waffles on, Jesse calls out Seviper and has it use Haze, and as he chokes and coughs and rushes for the fire alarm, Team Rocket makes their move.



Subtle they ain't.

Jeremiah gets in their way (he's pretty bulky!) while the twerps, Zoey and Candice discover the coughing Headmaster who tells them what is going on. Outside on the grounds, fatty Jeremiah calls out Eek the cat as James shows off his flexibility and gets a hug from Carnivine instead of the normal head bite. He has Carnivine use Vine Whip on Skuntank, wrapping it up tight as Jeremiah confidently orders it to use Scratch.... but it can't! So he tells it to use Night Slash.... but it can't!



Haha, the Quiz King is a useless fat piece of shit!

Seviper attacks Jeremiah but is smashed aside by a Quick Attack from Pikachu as the twerps, Candice, Zoey and the Headmaster arrive. Team Rocket respond by tearing their clothes off (hoorah!) and performing their motto, Candice freaking out to hear Meowth talk and the motto some reason devolving into a complaint about getting colds while hiding in caves in the mountains.

"When it comes to impossible you teacher types should talk."
"We sprint through life while you eggheads walk!"
"Through the snow!"
"And the sleet!"
"Round the clock!" screams Meowth.
"Bringing chaos at a frosty pace!" declares Jesse as James bops happily behind her next to a snowman.
"Dashing through snow with glee on my face!" adds James as Jesse bows gleefully in the snowfall behind him.
"Catching bad colds and taking Vitamin C," moans Jesse as the camera cuts to the three bundled up in a snow-cave.
"When everything's worse, nothing feels good to me," says James, snot dripping from all their noses before they all sneeze.
"Jesse!"
"And James!"
"Meowth's da name!"
"Putting teacher and students in their place."
"We're Team Rocket!"
"In your face!" they all finish together.

A furious Candice (and Zoey) vow to fight them, and Candice sends in Abomasnow to rescue the stolen Pokémon and asks Ash to free Skuntank. Team Rocket have their own strategy though, rather than stay and fight they'll use Haze and make their escape. As they attempt to do this though, Abomasnow blows away their Haze with Blizzard and coats them in snow, while Ash has Buizel use AquaJet in the cold, forming an icy coating around it that astonishes Jeremiah, Candice and the Headmaster... even Abomasnow, which hilariously forgets it can only say its own word and cries out,"HUH!?!"

Buizel crashes into Carnivine and sends it flying, Skuntank falling into Jeremiah's arms, while Zoey has Glameow use Shadowclaw to send Team Rocket blasting off again and the Pokeballs flying. Dawn has Piplup use Whirlpool to catch up all the Pokeballs, while Team Rocket soar through the air moaning that it is all the twerps fault and Meowth suggests that next time he's in a situation like this he'll remember it is cool for a Pokémon to talk!

The adult students have all rushed in, having seen Ash and Dawn's impressive displays, and Jeremiah apologises to Ash for the unkind things he said to him, saying that Ash's performance makes Jeremiah’s own Quiz Show performance seem pointless and worthless by comparison.

There's a reason for that, Jeremiah.

Brock tells Candice that surprise is part of Ash's battling style and how can she prepare for that? She says she'll come up with something, and asks Abomasnow if it has its kiai on, because coming up is going to be Ash's seventh Gym Battle!

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