ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
582: Trials and Adulations!	587: Gekitotsu! Manmu Tai Bosugodora!	Mamoswine Mills			Dawn and Mamoswine slip and fall into the script for an old episode.	Can't even successfully gang up on a solitary little girl	Bond with your giant guinea-pig mammoth by breaking its leg

Today finds the twerps moving through a seemingly neverending forest. Dawn finishes off her bottle of water and heads off for a nearby spring to refill as Ash and Brock sit down to wait for her return (why don't they go with her?).

Dawn reaches the spring and prepares to fill the bottle from a small waterfall, but above it a furious looking Aggron Hyperbeams at her for some vaguely plot-fulfilling reason and knocks her into the stream. She and Piplup are sent rushing away in the current! Looks like she's going to be facing some....



Dripping wet (you'll be arrested if you find that idea erotic) she pulls herself up onto the bank and realises that she is lost. She checks out Aggron with her Pokédex and discovers that it eats iron, while back at the spring Ash and Brock have found her waterbottle and realised what happened. Before they can search for her further though, Aggron attacks them and they're forced to flee. Brock figures there might be iron in the rocks nearby and Ash ponders on whether it was just being territorial. He calls out Staraptor and Gliscor to find Dawn and Piplup (and watch out for Aggron) and they set off, while Ash and Brock search from the ground.

Elsewhere, Dawn is belatedly worried that Ash and Brock might run into Aggron, when she should be more fearful for herself. Team Rocket pop out of the bushes and watch her pass, thrilled at the idea of getting a shot at a single twerpette. As Dawn runs on, a smokebomb explodes in front of her and familiar voices tell her that what's going on is strictly behind the back.... and what wonderful "behind the backs" they are!

"What's going on is strictly behind the back!"
"Thanks to your intellectual lack!"
"On the wind!"
"Past the stars!"
"Dig it, jack!" screams Meowth.
"Bringing real chaos at a breakneck pace!"
"Dashing hope, putting fear in its place."
"A rose by any other name's just as sweet."
"When everything's worse, our work is complete."
"Jesse!"
"And James!"
"Meowth's da name!"
"Putting the do-gooders in their place."
"We're Team Rocket!"
"In your face!" they finish together.

She tells them she doesn't have time for "you clowns" and Jesse.... throws a lasso at her for some reason. Dawn easily dodges the worst and most ineffective weapon of all time and things quickly denigrate into a Yanmega/Piplup throwdown which Piplup easily dominates..... so why is Dawn running away in a sudden panic?

Because Aggron is back, that's why!

They cheese it, of course, and Aggron chases after them as they double back and hide in the bushes. James checks things out with his Trainer Cards while Jesse complains that Dawn running away was typically only thinking of herself and not them!

Meanwhile, Ash and Brock are getting more worried at being unable to find Dawn, while Dawn herself has found a clearing in the forest and called out Buneary and Pachirisu to fire Ice-Beam and Discharge up into the sky as a signal flare to Ash and Brock (and Team Rocket and Aggron!) then they'll be saved!

Moments later, an alerted Aggron is roaring after them while a bemused Team Rocket watch on; figuring they'll let Aggron tire Dawn and her Pokémon out then swoop in to steal them. Dawn ends up backed into a deadend of a cliff and calls out her Mamoswine in hopes of fighting off the Aggron... and it promptly falls asleep. She tries to bribe it with a Poffin but Aggron isn't waiting and blasts it with Hyperbeam, which wakes up Mamoswine and kicks off a fight, a fight that Mamoswine.... loses!

Badly!

They crash off of the cliff and land on top of Mamoswine, watched by Team Rocket who are spotted by Aggron which chases them away. At the bottom of the cliff, Dawn checks on her Pokémon and discovers that Mamoswine's leg is hurt. She tries to return it to its Pokéball but can't find it, and they look around in a panic, because they can't travel with an injured Mamoswine. She figures the best thing to do is make a nice soft bed for Mamoswine and then "hide" the giant woolly mammoth-ass guinea pig, and with great effort Mamoswine is able to make it to the bed. They then hide the corpse (patient) and leave it looking depressed and hurt while Dawn ponders what to do. She remembers Brock's advice back when Pachirisu got injured, that she needs to remain calm. So all Mamoswine has to do is rely on the memory of a girl who wears an inch long skirt no matter what the weather.

Yeah, you'd have the same look of despair on your face too.

She sets out and finds a plant that Brock once showed her, presumably some kind of aloe vera since they use the "gel" from inside to ease pain. The Pokémon help her find more and she treats Mamoswine's leg and has Piplup use Whirlpool to put water in a bucket that.... they just... they just have a bucket? What?

No no, none of this story about 10 year olds out in the wilderness alone training semi-sentient superpowered animals to fight each other makes sense at all!

They freeze the water and set it on Mamoswine's leg, then go and collect berries while elsewhere Ash and Brock discover Mamoswine's lost Pokéball. As the sun sets, Dawn and her Pokémon overhear Team Rocket talking and hide, watching as they look for shelter from the Aggron still on their tail. Unfortunately, their plan is to hide in the tree that Mamoswine is sheltering under. Dawn has Ambipom sneak behind them and smash a rock into the ground repeatedly so they think that Aggron is approaching, so they flee to freeze and die or be murdered in the cold and heartless forest.

HOORAY!

Dawn tries to return her Pokémon to their Pokéballs but they don't want to leave Mamoswine. They hear Aggron approaching and hide, Pachirisu distracting it into going the other way by rustling some bushes.

With the sun set, Ash and Brock settle into a cave for the night and light a fire, saying they'll look for Dawn tomorrow. Brock is pretty sure the Pokéball belongs to Mamoswine (HOW THE FUCK DOES HE KNOW!?!) so it is probably out there as well. Dawn and her Pokémon sleep covered in leaves, well the Pokémon do at least. Dawn is up keeping an eye on Mamoswine, and has Buneary prepare another ice-pack for its leg. Presumably they pass the night without incident, but the next morning finds that Team Rocket had a less relaxing evening. They were busy building.... a robot Golem!

Well that's just terrifying!

They spot Aggron and enthusiastically attack, glad to finally get a chance at revenge, and promptly.... get their asses kicked!

The Robo-Golem spins directly into Dawn's tree, revealing Mamoswine to Team Rocket and causing Jesse to remark that if Dawn can hide that furry thing under such a tiny covering, she can hide anything!

We can only assume she's talking about Mamoswine.

They blast a "Boulder-Holder" missile at Mamoswine (a titty missile?), but it reacts by waking up and...... bashing the missile with its tusks! The missile crashes back into the Robo-Golem which spills Team Rocket out, and judging by the seat of James' pants, he got quite a fright!

Dawn remarks that the medicine/treatment seems to have done the trick while Brock tries to figure out why Team Rocket is around, but Ash just takes it all in stride and sends in Pikachu to blow them up. It's very good at it; they're pretty much immediately blasting off again!

But there is still Aggron to deal with, but as it stomps towards them, Mamoswine flicks Dawn and her Pokémon up onto its back and charges Aggron, wanting to fight it together.



It blocks Hyperbeam with its versatile tusks and blasts Aggron over with Ice Shard and then Ancient Power, and Aggron freaks out and runs away... crying! This leaves Brock and Ash impressed that not only did Dawn and Mamoswine beat Aggron, but Mamoswine followed Dawn's orders! Why it's just like the Ash/Charizard storyline only compressed hugely, abruptly over and without any of the emotional resonance!

Reunited with Ash and Brock, she tells Brock she followed his medicinal advice, and Ash returns Mamoswine's Pokéball to Dawn. As they chatter away, Mamoswine stomps over to the bananas Ambipom collected earlier and starts chowing down, and everyone laughs because it’s got a huge eating disorder!

Hooray!

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