ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
579: The Drifting Snorunt!	584: Fubuki no Naka no Yukimenoko!	Hostage-taking Hero			The twerps and Team Rocket join forces against a bizarrely talented Poacher	Care about each other!	Terrorist hostage taking is a good thing and gets results!

Today finds the twe- Team Rocket! walking through a blizzard in a snowy forest as Jesse moans about her freezing boo.....ts. As they argue amongst each other over terrible puns, they're approached by a.... Froslass! And it's coming on to them! Oh God, things are going to get a lot worse before they get any better!



Meanwhile the twerps are also lost in the forest blizzard though they at least have ponchos over their regular clothes (but Dawn is still in her tiny skirt). Dawn calls out Buneary and hugs it and Piplup to her, calling them her own little hot water bottles (May had her own permanent set!). Ash calls out Chimchar to light a fire for them, but shouting its own name causes snow to fall from the branches above them and fizzle out the fire. As they sit miserable in the cold, the flirty Froslass shows up and beckons to them as the blizzard stops and a cabin shimmers into view before them. They enter the "cabin" where a fire burns and Froslass.... makes them soup from an oven and pours a hot bath for the Pokémon!

This is really rather confusing!

As Piplup enjoys the hot water, it suddenly finds itself encased in ice, and the illusion around the twerps fades to reveal they are in an ice cave eating shaved ice rather than soup. Brock figures out that Froslass is causing all this, and Ash has Chimchar prepare to cut Piplup free. But Froslass menaces them with an Icebeam and holds them off before bringing in a frozen Meowth who reveals what happened to Team Rocket.

They too were fooled by the Froslass - named Miragi - which is holding Meowth hostage and has sent Jesse and James hunting its missing old friend Snorunt. Now it is the twerps turn, Froslass intends to hold Piplup hostage until the twerps find Snorunt for it. The twerps tell Froslass that they would have done this anyway and it didn't need to go through all this crap, and Dawn asks if they can have Piplup back anyway. It refuses and Meowth explains that a human promised to help it once and then tried to take Snorunt by force. The twerps promise to go find Snorunt and tell Piplup they'll be back soon because recall Piplup to its Pokéball they recall Piplup to its Pokéball have recall Piplup to its Pokéball no recall Piplup to its Pokéball other recall Piplup to its Pokéball option recall Piplup to its Pokéball but recall Piplup to its Pokéball to recall Piplup to its Pokéball do recall Piplup to its Pokéball as recall Piplup to its Pokéball Froslass recall Piplup to its Pokéball wants.

The twerps go a-wondering, Meowth telling them to give Jesse and James a message if they spot them. Staravia flies out above to scout for the twerps, while elsewhere Jesse and James are led by Wobbuffet in pursuit of what appears to be Snorunt. Staravia also spots a Snorunt and heads back to tell the twerps, and the two groups charge after the Snorunt and directly into.... each other! The twerps tell them they're looking for Snorunt too and Brock suggests they work together in a temporary ceasefire and Jesse and James.... agree!

Well this ain't gonna last!

Dawn does a Meowth impression to give them his message, and then they divide up to surround the Snorunt spotted by Staravia. They get on either side of it and try to calm it down as it panics, telling it that Froslass wants to be reunited, and just as it seems about to take heed...... a giant explosion blows them all off of their feet!

Well ain't that always the way!

And then things get.... worse!



A Glalie menaces over Snorunt and blasts as the twerps when Ash stupidly wonders if they are "friends". It Leers at Snorunt and knocks it into a panicked paralysis, then hovers away with Snorunt on its head, chased by the twerps and Team Rocket. James has Carnivine use Bullet Seed on Glalie and then Ash has Chimchar BATTER THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF IT before Buneary tries an Icebeam and Glalie stops playing around and blasts the fuck out Chimchar and Buneary. Just then a portly dude with half an Amish beard arrives and demands to know what they're doing to his Glalie, and is amused when they tell him that it was hurting Snorunt, because that's just what he told it to do!



Ash and Dawn's asses are horrified!

Yes he's a poacher, and he's after Snorunt because it's high on the list of wants for people who want to capture Pokémon which is perfectly legal but don't want to do it themselves because they're lazy so they get someone else to do it for them which makes it illegal now I guess.

Apparently an old legend claims that having a Snorunt makes you rich, and he hauls it up to put it into a cage while we're left to wonder what it is about Snorunt that allegedly makes people rich? Maybe the fact it has balls on its chin?



Look at 'em! Just wiggling around on its chin like that.

Chimchar tries to fight Glalie but is frightened by Leer, but that seems to leave Glalie open to an attack from Buneary. But it uses Protect to save it from Dizzy Punch, then throws them with both Carnivine AND Yanmega.

If this dude has such a tough Glalie, why the fuck is he reduced to poaching Snorunts in the forest?

Carnivine and Yanmega are smacked into Jesse and James and Glalie continues to throw down big time with Buneary and Chimchar, knocking Buneary back and leaving Ash to deal with Glalie himself. He has Chimchar use Dig to get underneath Glalie and burst out of the ground and into the air behind it, then blast it with Flamewheel once, then twice.

As they fight, Froslass glides by not far away calling out for Snorunt (leaving Piplup and Meowth frozen alone in the cave!) and spots the fight. Glalie gets between Chimchar and itself and prevents it using Dig, blasting it full force point blank with Hyperbeam. Ash encourages Chimchar to get back up but Glalie is prepared now and blocks with Protect and hits with Gyro-Ball as Froslass watches, but as Chimchar keeps rushing back in, Glalie keeps beating the crap out of it.

Seriously, is this poacher like the best fucking Pokémon trainer of all time or something?

Ash insists that they'll never give up because they're there to help Snorunt. Chimchar goes in for one last attempt, but then Froslass zips in and pounds Glalie. Ash is amazed, asking Froslass if it is true, does it REALLY want to help its best friend Snorunt? REALLY!? Why would it want to help the Pokémon it has such a deep and abiding relationship with? This is a shocking and unexpected thing as far as Ash is concerned! It and Chimchar team up for a Flamewheel/Shadowball combo that knocks Glalie and the poacher back into the cage, knocking the top open and allowing Snorunt to rush free and reunite with Froslass.

Wait.... the cage roof was never latched!?!

Froslass returns to the twerps hugging Snorunt and they ask if they can have Piplup back, and James puts his head into Carnivine's mouth to prove how much he trusts his Pokémon, and it agrees to return Meowth too. They then dump the still unconscious poacher and Glalie into the cage and presumably lock it, the twerps saying that Officer Jenny will be here soon (how did they contact her?) and then they all just leave the Poacher and his incredibly powerful Glalie alone in a cage in the middle of the snow..... a cage that even if the incredibly powerful Glalie couldn't break out of, the poacher probably has a key to the cage.

The twerps they aren't... they aren't so bright.

Froslass frees Meowth and Piplup, Meowth translating that it is sorry that it captured them and giving them direction to the nearest town. But now that Team Rocket are reunited, does it bode well for the twerps?



Can you trust those faces?

With the ceasefire officially ceased and the twerps guards down and their backs turned, it seems to be the perfect time to capture Pikachu directly in front of the powerful Froslass that easily captured all of them once before. They charge, slip and..... roll down the hill into a snowball, up a ramp and blast off again, Meowth complaining that his keister is frosty again and Jesse asking us to think about hers.

We do, Jesse, we do.

The twerps hear the noise of the blast off and look around confused wondering what that was, then head away waving their goodbyes to the reunited Froslass and Snorunt. Because once again, their adventures are....

BEST QUOTES

"Your keister? What about mine!?!"

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