ENGLISH NAME	JAPANESE NAME	POKEMOPOLIS NAME	DODGINESS RATING	ANIMATION	STORY	TEAM ROCKET	MORAL LEARNT
558: Battling The Generation Gap!	563: Pokémon Contesuto! Kannagi Taikai!!	The Devil Wears A Bouffant			Dawn beats up her mother's old rival and ruins her Coordinator career for a second time	Imitation will get you nowhere	Beat Joanna and she'll RUIN YOUR LIFE!

Today starts at the tail end of a Pokémon Contest between two young girls, one of whom looks oddly familiar. Joanna and her Glameow seem to have things in hand until the bun-haired Lilah reveals her and her Delcatty faked them out. So the winner is Celestic Town's Lilah, but who is this Joanna? According to that terrible hair it can be only one person - Dawn's Mum!

My goodness me, are we...



At the Pokémon Centre, Dawn is talking to her (adult!) mother, who has apparently been recounting the story of her battle with Lilah. It seems Lilah was the first person to ever beat her, ending a winning streak she had been on. Lilah went on to fame and fortune it seems, though unsurprisingly Ash has never heard of her, so Dawn shoves a magazine in his face. Apparently she is the world's top Pokémon Stylist... until we encounter someone else a couple of seasons down the line who has "always" been the top stylist as well.

Dawn's Mum tells them Lilah retired from contests before Joanna ever got a chance for a rematch. Dawn decides to go and visit her in her shop, since apparently she believes that Lilah will remember one particular Contest Battle she had amongst possibly hundreds sometime between 15-20 years ago. Ash isn't going along though, he is still trying to figure out a way to beat Fantina's Hypnosis, and since Dawn's next Pokémon Contest isn't on until THAT GODDAMN DAY, Dawn figures she and Brock have plenty of time to go down somebody else's memory lane.

Brock and Dawn arrive at the shop, and Brock is delighted to discover they have a copy of Wallace's Costume as well as an autographed photo. Dawn asks the lady at the counter if she can see Lilah, but she'll be out for the entire day.

Meanwhile Ash has called out his Pokémon to sit and think of a way to defeat Fantina's Hypnosis, and Think they do.... the only way Ash knows how!



Oh Ash.

Apparently hours have passed, the Pokémon all fell asleep too since they only have half a clue what the hell is going on anyway. The boy with the red head that comes off took them out and mumbled some nonsensical sounds at them and then closed his eyes and fell asleep, so they figured what the hell and followed suit.

He screams at them to wake up, while at the Contest Arena, Miriam is kicking off the Celestic Town Contest. Ash and his Pokémon have apparently rejoined the others, as he and Brock sit up in the stands to cheer Dawn on. Backstage, Dawn is brushing her hair and making a mess of it, her rebellious hair refusing to do as it is told. As she works on it, a suit-wearing woman rushes by shouting for the person following her to hurry up, and Lilah comes moping up behind her complaining that she said she didn't want to do any work today. Spotting Dawn and her terrible hair, either the stylist or the sexual predator in her can't resist, and she pounces!



Luckily for Dawn, it was the stylist that won out, as she fixes up Dawn's hair in a second. Dawn is ecstatic, even more so when she realises who it is, though Lilah seems less than pleased to have been recognised.... until SHE recognises Dawn!

WHA!?!

Before Dawn gets a chance to find out, the suit-wearing woman (Suitina is her name, it has been decided) rushes in and drags her out, while back on stage Miriam is introducing the judges before kicking off the appeals round. And the first Coordinator in is..... Lilah!

Her tits got bigger since her last appearance!

Lilah sends out a Cherrim, which changes form and then uses Magical Leaf and Sunny Day to create a glowing flower of light in the air.... welp, Dawn gonna lose!

More appeals follow, as in their wont, including a VERY proud Nosepass that just stands there looking proud, and then in comes the Solaceon Champion - Jesselina.... and she's dressed as Fantina!

Only without the cock and balls.

She uses Yanmega to..... uppercut her into the air! Then she uses Silver Wind to have Yanmega flop her up and down in the air as everyone just gapes.... what the fucking fuck? Not only Meowth and James seem horrified, but even the normally patiently pleased Wobbuffet!

Next out is Dawn, who has Buneary spin on its ear, then create an ice slide with Ice Beam and skate down it, then spin on its ears again.... but too fast! It goes out of control and lifts into the air, caught by the butt by Dawn who whispers for it to smile and pose and pretend like this was part of the plan!

Backstage she's rejoined by Ash and Brock and the Pokémon, and spot Lilah on the phone to.... Dawn's Mum! Dawn rushes in, mostly ignoring her mother to talk to Lilah, who explains to her that the battle with Joanna was the most important battle of her life. Despite winning, Lilah saw how Joanna was far more energised than her, and even though she was only one ribbon away from entry to the Grand Festival, she wasn't sure if she wanted to continue with this. She asked Joanna if she should take up the opportunity to train as a Stylist, and shockingly, Joanna told the only girl who had ever been able to defeat her to go ahead and leave the world of Pokémon Contests forever and not be a potential competitor to her at the Grand Festival.

This would explain both Dawn's mother's success in the Contest World as well as her terrible, terrible hair.

Lilah explains that she saw Dawn battling in a contest and she remembered the old days as a Coordinator, and decided to take another chance to win her Fifth Ribbon. But she intends to battle Dawn in this Contest, using the same battle techniques she used against her mother, and the bitch looks like she means to KILLLLLLL to get what she wants. Just then Miriam appears on screen to announce the Final 8, and they're revealed one by one till only one spot remains, and both Dawn and Jesse want it.....



Guess which one got it, Gentle Dodgers!

So the remaining contestants are randomly paired off, and it's Lilah vs Ms. Green; Victorian Ruffian vs Sailor Ruffian; Princess vs Waiter; and Dawn vs a Prince!

Lilah tells Dawn she wants it to come down to the two of them, and Dawn reveals right in front of Lilah that she'll be using Ambipom. The battles commence, till inevitably it comes down to Lilah vs Dawn (it would have been great if they'd BOTH been knocked out of the match). The twerps cheer for them up in the stands while back at home, Joanna watches with her lips compressed tight into a smile as she watches her daughter throw down with her former rival and possible sexual conquest.

Dawn is freaking out over the calibre of her opponent until suddenly something hits her and she actually slaps herself with glee - if she loses she can just try again later! So just relax and have the goddamn battle and see what happens! Ambipom starts off with Swift, but Delcatty Substitutes to completely avoid the attack and appear behind Ambipom in the air, wrapping Ambipom's own tail around it and using Shockwave just as it did to Glameow all those years ago.

It creates the "Tiger Lilly Smile" that defeated Joanna 20 years ago (that sounds vaguely perverse), but the match is only just beginning and Dawn takes a leaf out of Lilah's book and uses Double-Team, and Ambipom gangrapes Delcatty HARD in front of all those people.

You heard me. But su

ddenly Ambipom gets hearts in its eyes and Miriam announces it has been "afflicted by Attract Status". Brock mentions that when a male like Delcatty is attacked by a female like Ambipom (finally settling once and for all the question of Ambipom's gender!), it can cause the female to be "afflicted by Attract Status".

Sounds like an STD.

Delcatty uses Sing and.... it actually Sing's Jigglypuff's song! Ambipom falls asleep and Ash REALLY takes an interest since this is like Fantina. Delcatty uses Iron Tail to knock Ambipom flying, while Joanna seems to be delighted watching her old rival beating the shit out of her daughter.

Ambipom takes a direct shot of Shockwave that costs it points but wakes it up, and it fires back with Swift. Delcatty uses Substitute to avoid once more, but Ambipom was prepared and appears behind it, smashing it to the ground with Double Hit. But once again it falls in lust with Delcatty, which Brock warns is a risk whenever a direct attack is made. Dawn figures she has nothing to lose though and orders a Double Team, and by chance the move works, with Delcatty surrounded by lovestruck visions of Ambipom. Lilah orders Sing, but as the Jigglypuff song travels around hitting the illusions of Ambipom, the real deal manages to hit a love punch right on Delcatty!

Love hurts, it's just a little home correction!

Lilah loses points, though Dawn is still well behind, and as the Attract Status wears off, Dawn orders a massive blast of Swift - well she doesn't, but Ambipom makes it a massive blast anyway! And just as well, as Delcatty Substitutes out of the way only to be hit by the continuing blastwave, costing Lilah huge points. Panicking, she orders a Shockwave, and it hits the oncoming blast of Swift and creates a Galaxy of Light in the sky! Which you don't see every day.... unless you include all those galaxies you see every night except they're so far away that they just look like pinpricks of light, which really aren't quite as impressive.

The two Pokémon continue to blast into the Galaxy of light, pushing it one way and then the other, till it seems Delcatty must have the advantage.... only for the Shockwave to suddenly peter out and the Swift to blast full-force into Delcatty as time runs out and the winner is announced.



DAWN!

Dawn continues the family tradition of destroying Lilah's dreams in order to ensure her own career success!

Lilah congratulates Dawn for a great battle, and Dawn is presented with the Contest Ribbon, her third, putting her only two away from Grand Festival entrance!



At Lilah's shop, Lilah offers the twerps their choice of her valuable fashion accessories to have for free. Everyone plays dress up, including Ash who has the worst fashion choice of all time and Croagunk who blings it up. Lilah wishes them all the best while Ash says he now has an idea how to deal with Fantina, and with that ends not just Dawn's quest for her Third Ribbon.... but Lilah's hopes, dreams and chance for a second chance she squandered so many years ago.

And all it cost Dawn's Mother was a horrible, horrible hairstyle.

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